We sure are! Give it up for Marty, everyone! What a stellar engineer. Which channel are you using to tell me this? Marty, I’m looking at a little red light that says we’re broadcasting. Because what does the show have to be, Marty?

You know that thing that should never happen? It happened. I had to move some things around, and that might have impacted some vital systems. Right, but the signal was getting disrupted. The other towers will make our signal strong enough to carry The Perfect Story. With all the other PseudoPod towers extruding into our world we’re getting extra signals from those worlds too. Yes, I can hear you Marty, what’s going on? (distorted, from a different part of the tower) Every Alasdair’s voice, every PseudoPod tower transmitting as one– We’ve got a wonderful night planned, with live reporting, and prizes, and with all the Alasdairs aboard, I will bring you The Perfect Story, and I promise you, it’s true. Tonight, the witching hour is our one window to bring all the PseudoPod towers together and present to you, The Perfect Story. Haha! That’s right! As you know, in every dimension there is a PseudoPod, and in every PseudoPod, there is an Alasdair. We are so excited to bring you a very special episode, a rooftop extravaganza to celebrate the Witching Hour! Hello and welcome back to PseudoPod, I’m your host, Alasdair Stuart. (saccharine, without irony, like a morning talk-show host) Canned studio audience applause as the song concludes. A moment of distortion interrupts, followed by a saxophone-driven 90’s talk show cover of the same song. The familiar strains of PseudoPod’s opening music, “Bloodletting on a Kiss” begins. (WITCH, brightly) PseudoPod, The Sound of Horror! PseudoPod’s theme music “Bloodletting on a Kiss” is by Anders Manga and used with permission.ĪCT ONE SCENE 1: INSIDE A RECORDING STUDIO

Featuring David Rheinstrom, Marsha Harman, Jeffrey Nils Gardner, Nathaniel Ewert-Krocker, Kat Evans, Abby Doud, Krista D’Agostino, Ele Matelan, and Pat Kingįeaturing sounds from Free Sound under Creative Commons licenses.

Unwell executive producers: Eleanor Hyde and Jeffrey Nils Gardner.

Nathan Lunsford as News Anchor and Detective Mark Anderson.

with Shogo Miyakita as Georgie Torrance.

portions of audio supplied by PseudoPod.

narrated by Hollis Monroe and Tonia Ransom.

The Narrator was voiced by Matthew OK Smith.

written by Matthew OK Smith and Naomi Clarke.

Recording studio warning light